Some NLP Techniques

1 What is NLP?

NLP stands for Neuro-Linguistic Programming. This is certainly a mouthful. But basically it

has three elements:

Neuro, meaning neurological processes of our senses

Linguistic, meaning use of language to order our thoughts and to communicate

Programming, meaning the way we organize our ideas and actions to produce results In more simplistic terms it is what constitutes personal excellence and the techniques for achieving it. NLP deals with how we structure what we experience about the world through our senses, and most especially the filters we use to create a model of the world around us. In addition, it is about the language we use in creating such models (maps) and how we act to create results. These actions can be intentional or unintentional, conscious or unconscious. By understanding the filters we have we can change them; create a better map, which in turn creates better outcomes. Personal excellence can then be achieved.

 

NLP is a vast and growing area of study but it is not hypnosis. Hypnosis and NLP overlap, and it is this overlap we are concerned about here. What NLP provides for hypnosis is a new way of looking at certain aspects of it, but more importantly, some new techniques in overcoming problems and in pursuing personal excellence. Although we are concerned largely with the overlap between NLP and hypnosis, it is useful to set out the ten basic presuppositions of NLP. These are as follows.

1. The map is not the territory
2. Experience has a structure
3. If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it
4. The mind and body are parts of the same system
5. People already have all the resources they need
6. You cannot NOT communicate
7. The meaning of your communication is the response you get
8. Underlying every behaviour is a positive intention
9. People are always making the best choice(s) available to them

10. If what you are doing isn’t working, do something else: do anything else We can summarize these as follows.

The map is not the territory. Our mental maps of the world are not the world. We respond to our maps, rather than directly to the world. Mental maps, especially feelings and interpretations, can be updated more easily than the world can be changed.

Experience has a structure. Our thoughts and memories have a pattern to them. When we change that pattern or structure, our experience will automatically change. We can neutralize unpleasant memories and enrich memories that will serve us.

If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it. We can learn an achiever’s mental map and make it our own. Too many people think certain things are impossible without ever going out and trying them. Pretend that everything is possible. When there is a physical or environmental limit, the world of experience will let you know about it.

The mind and body are parts of the same system. Our thoughts instantly affect our muscle tension, breathing feelings, and more, and these in turn affect our thoughts. When we learn to change either one, we have learned to change the other.

 

People already have all the resources they need. Mental images, inner voices, sensations, and feelings are the basic building blocks of all our mental and physical resources. We can use them to build up any thought, feeling or skill we want, and then place them in our lives where we want or need them most.

You cannot NOT communicate. We are always communicating, at least nonverbally, and words are often the least important part. A sigh, a smile, and a look are all communications. Even our thoughts are communications with ourselves, and they are revealed to others through our eyes, voice tones, postures, and body movements.

The meaning of your communication is the response you get. Others receive what we say and do through their mental map of the world. When someone hears something different from what we meant, it is a chance for us to notice that communication means what is received. Noticing how our communication is received allows us to adjust it, so that next time it can be clearer.

Underlying every behaviour is a positive intention. Every hurtful, harmful, and even thoughtless behaviour had a positive purpose in its original situation. Yelling in order to be acknowledged. Hitting to fend off danger. Hiding to feel safe. Rather than condoning or condemning these actions, we can separate them from the person’s positive intent, so that new, updated, and more positive choices can be added that meet the same intent.

People are always making the best choice(s) available to them. Every one of us has his or her own unique personal history. Within it, we learned what to do and how to do it, what to want and how to want it, what to value ad how to value it, what to learn and how to learn it. This is our experience. From it, we must make all of our choices, that is, until new and better ones are added.

If what you are doing isn’t working, do something else: do anything else. If you always do what you’ve done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten. If you want something new, do something new, especially when there are so many alternatives.

The first presupposition is probably the most important. The world is a complex place and in order to make sense of it we make mental maps: mental constructs of reality. These maps arise by creating filters that we use to simplify the world in which we live. It is these filters that constitute our present programming. The programming may be too restrictive; it may be faulty; it may be heavily laden with value judgements and certainly arises from our experiences. NLP is about changing filters. If you change the filter then you change your world because you change the map of the territory. You cannot change the territory, but you can change one or more filters, and hence the way you respond to people and situations. NLP therefore introduces greater flexibility and more choices into your life. The situation is illustrated in figure 1.

 

Figure 1

In attempting to understand the maps people make of the world, great attention is played to filters. Important filters are thought of as frames. Some typical frames are set out in table 1.

Table 1 Filter frames in NLP

 

Name	Usual frame	NLP frame
Behavioural frame	Think about problems. Analyze what the problem is and why you have it.	Think about outcomes. What are your goals? What resources do you have?
Why/How frame	Why questions. Leads to justification an reasons without changing anything.	How questions. Directs attention to understanding the structure of a problem and possible resolutions
Failure/Feedback frame	Failure simply describes a result you do not want. Results are used to redirect effort. Failure leads to no change.	No such thing as failure, only results. Results can be used to provide feedback to make corrections and so change the results. Feedback and correction used to achieve goals.
Necessities/ Possibilities frame	Consider only necessities. Here emphasis is on the constraints of a problem.	Considers possibilities. Look at what you can do, the choices available to you.
Assumption/ Curiosity and Fascination frame	Concerned about assumptions and failure. Failure emphasized that limits change	Relearn how a child learns and the curiosity and fascination they have in learning. Unconcerned about failure: change is far more important.

It is apparent from this table that NLP involves a shift of focus. But in just the same way that lateral thinking involves a shift of focus NLP does exactly the same. This shift of focus emphasizes goals, the resources for achieving them, how to resolve problems, utilizing constant feedback by looking at what you do and the choices open to you, and not to be concerned about failure but rather to welcome change. The situation is shown in figure 2, adapted from O’Connor and Seymour, Introducing NLP, p.15.

 

Figure 2

2 Communication and rapport

It is often said that communication must involve at least two people. This is both true and not true. In self-hypnosis there is only one person. But that person divides into two selves: the subject and the hypnotist. It is as if they become two people. But this is important because communication is about how two or more people interact. Communication is not merely by words; it also involves volume level, intonation, gestures, postures and general body language. NLP stresses the importance of ensuring that the message you send to the other person is the message that they receive. Although in self-hypnosis you know what message you are sending in terms of the words you are using, it is still not obvious that the other part of you is receiving the same message. To illustrate the point, imagine there is the subject-self and the hypnotist-self. Now imagine that the hypnotist-self is shouting at the top of their voice for the subject-self to go into trance. Would the subject-self comply? Probably not. Even when we talk to ourselves (which we do frequently) we can use a soft voice, a harsh voice or even a sexy voice. Internal communication has all the nuances as external communication. What the other person understands by your communication is revealed in the response they give to it. Their response depends on their map of the territory just as yours does, and even if the territory is the same, it is most unlikely that the two maps are the same. That is why communication can break down.

Question

In the case of self-hypnosis will the subject-self and the hypnotist-self have the same

map of the territory?

The answer is: not necessarily. You can impart to the subject-self all the doubts, phobias, etc. while endowing to the hypnotist-self all positive, confident and knowledgeable attributes. The negative subject-self will have a different map from the positive hypnotist-self. In NLP good rapport is about appreciating another person’s map of the world while retaining your own. Good rapport involves trust, confidence and participation. When two people are in rapport, communication flows freely, body language matches and individuals mirror and match each other. This mirror and matching is in terms of body language, postures and most especially eye contact. In other words, communication takes on the form of a dance: the better the rapport the more fluent the dance. Even in self-hypnosis, it is necessary to create good rapport between the subject-self and the hypnotist-self. In some respects this is why self-hypnosis can be more difficult than heterohypnosis. In heterohypnosis you are more likely to trust and believe in the hypnotist. If you are a doubting Thomas, then it is likely that you will attribute doubts to both the subject-self and the hypnotist-self. The way to succeed, therefore, is to attribute to the hypnotist-self all what you would attribute to a most successful and famous hypnotist. Someone in whom you have complete trust, faith, confidence and belief in. Another reason why self-hypnosis may be difficult in having good rapport between the subject-self and the hypnotist-self is the general lack of eye contact. Again the message is try to involve eye contact in the two parts of yourself that you create. You may find that this takes a bit of practice.

 

When a therapist wishes to create a change in a client their first job is to gain rapport, and in the process of doing this they mirror and match. They come to understand and appreciate the client’s view of the territory: the client’s map. But good rapport is good communication: it will not bring about change. Pacing and leading is what brings about change. Pacing is the act of creating rapport while leading involves changing your behaviour so that the other person follows. You can only lead if the other person is willing to follow; and the other person will only follow if they trust and believe in you. In other words, pacing must come before leading. Attempting to lead without first pacing is unlikely to succeed – a failing in many politicians who want to lead without pacing!

 

The difficulty in self-hypnosis is that pacing and leading are obvious since it is you who is doing it. Simply accept this fact, but continue as if the hypnotist-self is pacing and leading the subject-self. The way to do this is attribute all the positivism and wisdom you can muster and endow them to the hypnotist-self. Make the hypnotist-self larger than life.

4 Anchors and hypnosis

Emotional states have a powerful influence on how we feel and how we behave. Change the emotional state and you change how the person feels and behaves. NLP is concerned about how to bring about a particular emotional state: how to elicit an emotional state. The simplest way to do this is to ask someone to recall an event in which the particular emotional state of interest was very prevalent and very strong. Even more success will be achieved if you try to match the emotion you are trying to elicit with your own expression, body posture, tone of voice and gestures. Furthermore, to elicit the emotion fully the person must be associated with the image (being inside the image) and not dissociated from it (outside the image looking in).

 

An anchor is a stimulus that is linked to and triggers an emotional state. The stimulus can be either external or internal, but is usually external. Typical external anchors are a particular sound, such as church bells; or a particular visual stimulus, like the nod of the head; or a stimulus involving smell, such as the smell of freshly baked bread.

 

Anchors are created in two ways.

1. By repetition

2. A single event with a strong emotion and occurring at the right moment

Repetition is required when there is little or no emotion. Put simply, the greater the emotion involved in the trigger the less it needs to be repeated. The repetition is in order to establish a connection or association between the trigger and the elicited emotion. You cannot activate something if it is not connected to the thing you wish to activate. Each of us already has many anchors that involve all the five senses. These have arisen from our life’s experiences. A particularly strong negative association is a phobia. Seeing a spider can be enough to elicit a sense of panic. Most anchors, if not all, have arisen whether we wanted them or not. The usefulness of NLP is bringing to our awareness the anchors we already possess; giving us a means to changing those anchors we do not want; and creating new anchors that elicit emotional states that we do want.

 

Most anchors are involved in associations that lead to habits. Habits are by no means all bad. We all have many habits: some good and some bad. Through a deeper understanding of anchors, we can improve the habits that we want and eliminate or change the habits that we do not want. Furthermore, we can use anchors to create new habits. The situation is shown in figure 4.

 

 

Figure 4

 

We shall describe in detail how to create a new response by creating a suitable anchor. Other anchors follow a similar pattern. The first thing you must do is choose an emotional response you want. You need to think about this before you enter self-hypnosis. You then associate with it a stimulus (anchor). The important consideration for the anchor is that it can readily be brought to mind whenever you want it. You will, in fact, require three anchors for this technique: one for each of the main modalities of feeling sound and visual. In each case the anchor should be unique, distinctive and discrete. Unique so that it is not something you generally do; distinct so that it does not occur all the time and does not get associated with other states and behaviours; and discrete so that you can perform it any time and anywhere without anyone else being aware you are doing it. We shall illustrate the type of anchors in a moment. The point is that you should decide on these before you enter a state of self-hypnosis.

 

The most important type of anchors in NLP is referred to as resource anchors. A resource anchor is something that you have or have experienced in the past. That is why it belongs to your set of resources. If you have not experienced something, for example, then you cannot call on it. If it is a positive emotional resource then it is something you will have experienced in the past. A resource, therefore, refers to any physical, emotional state you have had; any thought, experience or event that you have had; and any of your physical or mental attributes. Think of it like your house where you are listing all its resources: items in the rooms, lighting, colour schemes, and general ambience of each room.

 

We are now in a position to describe the technique. First place yourself in self-hypnosis. Now identify the situation or state you want to change. Let us suppose this is how you behave at work. Next you identify a particular resource that will help in bringing about the change you want. Suppose this is confidence. The next step is to think back in your life to when you experienced the resource strongly. Even if you lack confidence now, you were not born that way. There is always some moment in the past when you experienced confidence. Next choose the anchor. This anchor will bring to mind your feeling of confidence. It is in fact composed of three individual anchors: one from each of your main representational systems – feeling, sound and sight. Thus, you need to establish a feeling anchor, an auditory anchor and a visual anchor. Here we shall just give one example of each.

Feeling:        Bring together your thumb and index finger on your right hand

Auditory:      Say the word ‘confident’ to yourself

Visual:          Some specific past memory image in which you were supremely confident

The next step is to recall an occasion in the past in which you were supremely confident. Recall it in full detail – feelings and all. In doing this what you are trying to recall is the moment you were at your most confident. Exactly what were you doing, how did you feel, and what were you thinking about at the time. Step into the experience and associate with it. When the feeling of confidence begins to diminish you have just past the peak. At this point, step out of the image: dissociate from it.

 

The next step is to anchor the resource (confidence). Step back into your image and re-create it up to the point of greatest intensity. At that moment, bring your thumb and index finger together, say the word ‘confident’, and bring to mind your picture of confidence. Hold this for a few moments and then step out of the image once again. It is important to test this anchor. Bring your index finger and thumb together, say the word ‘confident’ to yourself and recall your picture of confidence. If you do indeed feel confident then you have accessed the resource you want and can now use it any time you need it. If it does not feel strong enough, then go back to re-experiencing the peak and activating the three anchors once again. Test again. Keep doing this until you feel you can access the confidence resource anytime and anywhere.

 

The last step is to think of some future possible situation where you will want to feel confident. What you need to think of is something that will trigger your need for the resource – when you need to be confident. In our example it is how to behave at work. Suppose you always take a lift up to your workplace. Then this would be a suitable trigger. This will trigger your anchor when you use it at work and each time you take the lift on arrival this will activate the anchor.

 

We have explained the anchor technique in detail. On a first reading it appears a long and involved technique. But this is partly the problem of putting it into words. BOX 1 summarizes the technique. It can be much quicker than the description given here. But it does require some practice to use the technique properly. We shall illustrate its many uses in bringing about specific changes you may want to bring about in Part IV.

BOX 1 Summary of resource anchoring with self-hypnosis Place yourself in self-hypnosis. Identify the state or situation you want to change. Identity a particular resource that helps to bring change about. Recall a past experience when the resource was most intense. Select three anchors: one for each of feeling, sound and vision. Re-experience the resource and at its peak apply the three anchors. Then step out. Test the anchor by activating the three anchors. If you are not satisfied with your association, then go back to step 6. Identify a signal to trigger your anchor. Bring yourself out of self-hypnosis.

Here we described a resource anchor, but there are three types of anchors.

1. Resource anchor. Any physical, emotional state you have had; any though, experience or event that you have had; or any of your physical or mental attributes that can be used in association with an emotional response you desire.
2. Chained anchors. This refers to individual resource anchors that are linked in a chain where the first activates the second, and so on. Since each anchor elicits a response, you keep changing the response each time to get closer to the final response you wish to create.
3. Collapsing anchors. This refers to activating two anchors simultaneously where the response for each is opposite. In general, one anchor fires a negative response while the other fires a positive one. By firing them simultaneously you change the negative one and bring into being a new emotional state.

On the face of it anchoring may appear to be just a stimulus-response mechanism. But this is not true. The anchor does not bring about the response. What the anchor does is to recreate the chosen resource and have almost as much power over a present situation as occurred originally. Furthermore, the anchor is triggered by some situation that in the past activated a negative response but now activates a positive one. In addition, you choose the resource and you choose the trigger. To the extent that the situation involves a stimulus-response mechanism you have fully taken control of it to serve your purpose. The difference is illustrated in figure 5. You can even bring on the desired response by activating the anchor. So, for example, if you need to feel confident at some public speaking and nothing to do with work, you can still activate your anchor.

 

 

Figure 5

Exercise #1: Changing memories on your timeline

Place yourself in self-hypnosis. When sufficiently deep, think back to a very empowering, positive and emotive memory. It needs to be all three: (1) empowering, (2) positive and (3) full of emotion. It is the type of feeling you have when you are very good at something. Not only do you know you are good, but you feel positive and confident when you do it. If you have more than one, then chose the strongest. Once you have chosen your empowering memory then recall it in great detail. Exactly the situation and most especially the feelings you have. Next think of some ordinary memory that has no real significance for your life. Your last bath or shower or your last trip to the shops would be suitable. Now compare the two memories. What you are looking for are differences, most especially what is contained in your empowering memory that gives you this feeling. Is it bigger, brighter or more colourful; does it feel close to you or far way; does it involve sounds and if so are they louder. These are the submodalities we referred to above. Since you will utilize the empowering memory on a number of occasions it may be worth noting down these submodalities.

 

Now think of your timeline and float above it as we described earlier. It is important, however, to take with you all the elements of your empowering, positive and emotional memory. Next consider a time or event in the past when you would have liked to have had the resources of this empowering memory. An event or memory that had you been empowered and positive a totally different change in your future would have occurred. Once you have this clearly identified on your timeline, slide down your timeline – of course, taking with you your empowering memory – to just before the critical event you want to change. Now move rapidly forward along your timeline through the event in question but with all the force of your empowering memory. See, hear and feel the memory change as you now pass through it in your mind’s eye. Then awaken.

 

This technique can be made even more effective by cycling through past memories and future possible experiences. To be more specific, suppose you wish you were more confident. The empowering image you are seeking is a time when you were supremely confident. This was likely to be a much earlier time in your life. It may only be when you are playing a particular sport; it may be when you were in your teens or at school. There is always some time in your life when you felt supremely confident. Let us suppose you are about 25 and the time and situation when you were extremely confident is when you were 15. What you now do is recall the condiment memory, recall an ordinary memory and compare them as outlined above. Rise above your timeline and position yourself just before the first time you recall when you lacked confidence. With your empowering confident memory move through it. Continue to move through your timeline passing through all memories when you lacked confidence, but with your empowering image clearly in focus until your present. What is happening is you are imprinting the empowering, positive, confident image over those you want to change: and they will change. It is like adding sugar to tea; the taste of the tea will change. So in the same way, your memories in which you lacked confidence will also change. Next move into your future along your timeline to those experiences where you want to feel confident. Take with you your emotive, positive, confident image imprinting it on as many future experiences as you can think of: making your future a positive and confident future. Repeat the whole process if you wish a few times to reinforce it. Then awaken.

 

Exercise #5 Circle of confidence

1. Place yourself in self-hypnosis. Now stand up with your eyes closed and go back to a memory when you were supremely confident. Even if you lack confidence now, you were not born that way. There will always be some situation in the past when you felt supremely confident. This will be easier to locate than you think because you are in a relaxed trance state. Recall all the feelings, the situation, what you heard and any other sensation from you five senses.

1. As you feel this confidence rising within you, imagine a coloured circle on the floor around your feet. The circle can be any thickness you want it to be, any colour you want, it can have symbols in it or it can have a sound. Whatever form the circle takes, it is to represent power. See and feel the power of the circle rise with a rise in

2. your confidence. When the feeling of confidence is at its height (and you will recognize this by it starting to decline), then step out of the circle.

2. Now think of some up-coming event in which you want to feel confident. It may be a presentation, an interview, a sporting event or a night out with someone you like and want to get to know. Picture the future situation in detail just before you need the feeling of confidence. More specifically you want a trigger that will be there when the future even arrives. It may be the room, the building, the venue for a sporting event or a restaurant.

3. As soon as the trigger is clear in your mind, step back into the circle and feel the confidence you imprinted in the circle rise through the event in your mind. Yes, imagine you have all the confident feelings you had originally now available to you in this circle.

4. Step out of the circle leaving the confident feelings still within it. Now think of another, a different, future event where you want to feel confident. What you will find is that you will automatically recall the feelings of confidence that you require. If you do not get this strongly, go back and repeat. What you have done is programmed a feeling of confidence for the up-coming event. Now wake yourself up.

We have only touched on this growing area of NLP. Although quite separate from hypnosis, the techniques are very frequently combined with hypnosis – which often gives them extra force.